By: Brandi Mills, Life | Fitness | Women's Wellness Coach
Posted: April 7, 2020 | 10:40AM EST
As mothers, we have a tough, thankless job that doesn’t come with any handbook of directions on how to navigate motherhood. We are forced to tap into that divine feminine intuition that sometimes can be tough to listen to when we are tired, working, trying to raise kind, responsible human beings and juggling all life throws at us. That can lead to opportunities for negative narratives filling up your mind. Then comes the comparisons to other mothers, without much help from social media. It then leads to focusing on what we did wrong to what a horrible parent we are. You can head down a rabbit hole of despair fairly quickly.
But there are some things we can do to stay centered and close to our authentic selves. The more we work on our own narrative, the more others will catch on as well. If there is anything we need more of now, it's to support each other in this motherhood journey even if situations are not the same. We need to unite as mothers because, let's be honest, it takes a village to raise a child!
So how can we do that?
Changing the narrative.
Sounds easier said than done, I know. But don’t complicate it because it is a simple task that builds into a positive habit. When you find negative thoughts flooding your mind, instantly turn it into something positive. Whether it's immediately thinking of 3 things you are grateful for or just saying something positive about yourself instead. This will train your mind into releasing the negative and focusing on the positive. Instead of thinking about everything you did wrong, think about everything you did right! I guarantee that list is longer!
Something else I believe is a mental game changer are mantras.
Mantras are positive, unique affirmations or statements about you or your situation that you can play on repeat in your mind daily. They can help you challenge and overcome self sabotaging thoughts.You can choose one daily or a few different ones to repeat throughout the day. I suggest starting your day, upon waking, with an affirmation that will set the tone for the day. Write it down so you can be reminded of it often.
If you are having trouble coming up with your own, here is a list of 30 Motherhood Mantras that will get you through the chaos that motherhood comes with. I challenge you to pick one mantra each day for 30 days. Keep it with you all day, say it with conviction, sit with it and journal if you feel called to do so.
I love myself enough, to nurture myself, so I have an abundance of love to give to others.
I trust my intuition to lead me in motherhood.
I am capable of amazing things because I helped create something amazing.
My body is beautiful and deserves grace in this season of healing.
I am strong because I helped create, carry and birth my little one(s).
Peace begins with me. The more peaceful I am inside, the more peace I have to share with others. – Louise Hay
This is just a season of life that needs me to nurture and be nurtured.
I love myself because_____________.
I am filled with an abundance of love.
Today I will find peace in knowing that the sun always rises and so will I.
Even the littlest thing I do, serves the greater good of my family.
I parent with confidence, without guilt or comparisons. Other mothers are not me, as I am not them.
I give myself permission to do something that nourishes my mind, body and soul.
Loving my child(ren) is more important than loving every moment of motherhood.
I am a good mom, even as I work to become a better one.
I was chosen to parent my child because I was exactly what he/she needed.
There is an abundance of love and peace in this home, even in the midst of chaos.
I am grateful for the quality time I get to spend with my child(ren).
I will do my best as a mom, and that is always enough.
I model self-love to my child(ren) without guilt.
I push through challenges so that my struggles today will become my strengths tomorrow.
My love is given from my full, heart centered, cup.
I will let go of how I think today is supposed to go and accept how it flows.
I am capable. I can do this; I am made for this.
I am powerful. I can do anything, but not everything.
What I am doing is enough.
I am strong. I have survived so many things to get to where I am.
My voice matters. My opinion counts, and so do others’.
I may succeed, or I may instead simply learn from this situation.
Fear, failure, and faithlessness are choices. Courage, love and persistence are also choices.
This Motherhood Mantra practice encourages positivity, it encourages you to feel your best when life is challenging that. The mental load a mother can feel can be quite heavy, a regular mantra practice can help ease that load. Managing our own mental load will create space to hold for others which is the foundation of our role as a mother. Mantras may seem like a tiny tool but it holds a big punch when it comes to our mental health. So, pick your mantra, feel your mantra, and put the action into life.
Editor's Note: Brandi Mills is a wellness blogger, Holistic Life Coach, Yoga Teacher, Fitness Nutrition Specialist, Personal Trainer, and Mompreneur from small town, Blacksville, West Virginia that has recently made Buckhannon, WV her new home with her husband and son. Brandi is passionate about helping others find their own personal balance that she meshed all of her credentials together to bring a fresh new approach to balance and created The Balancebuilding® Philosophy. This way of living provides information and tools to help others achieve complete synchronicity between the mind, body and soul, for a lifetime. She is on a mission to share tools to empower others to confidently live as their best selves. She created the Balancebuilding® Philosophy after going on her own journey to finding balance, recovering from the physical and mental extremes from competitive bodybuilding, going from a bodybuilder to a balancebuilder.
Brandi has a total of 10 years working in the healthcare field, including time specifically with High Risk Obstetrics as an Ultrasound technician. She has dedicated the last 2 years guiding and inspiring clients to live their best, balanced life. Along with the Mountaineer News, Brandi has contributed writings to Thrive Global and contributes meditations to Insight Timer.
After finishing her Yoga Teacher Training and becoming a mother herself, she has dedicated a lot of her time focusing specifically on women’s health, including multiple certifications in perinatal wellness and pelvic floor healing through yoga and exercise. Her openhearted, nonjudgmental approach focuses on helping individuals reach their mind, body and soul goals through coaching, yoga, nutrition, and exercise.
With a variety of services offered, such as custom wellness plans, general and private yoga classes, a Postpartum Wellness Online course, occasional programs, workshops and retreats, there are many opportunities to explore what Brandi has to offer.